i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
