I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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