I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize