69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
what day is it and did you see me today?
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
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