I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Randomize
