before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
