He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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