The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Randomize
