OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
The power of my boobs compel you
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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