I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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