Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Randomize