i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize