everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
and eventually we just all took our pants off
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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