Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
