I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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