lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
