You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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