dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
