Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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