I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I did not marry a roomba.
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