my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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