4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
