I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
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