Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
