From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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