we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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