remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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