dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
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Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
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you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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