dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Can I color on your dick again?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
