we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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