No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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