Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
