I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".