Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car