I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
