well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he shaved USA in his pubs
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
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bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
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I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
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