I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
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