Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize