I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
dude i'm inner monologue high
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
