Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
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