I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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