yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
