She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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