So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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