Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize