just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Just cropdusted the office
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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