I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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