Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Couch. On fire.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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