How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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