Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
this just has baby written all over it
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
